I Want to Have a Child, Whatever it Takes!

Carmen Martinez-Jover

Carmen presents in her autobiography the problem of infertility representing it through images of her paintings, paintings that touch the heart of the reader. After telling the story of the constant struggle between doctors and syringes, the author decides to paint chairs as a way of relief, chairs that express each one of her longings, each moment of sadness, each situation of powerlessness. You feel how the author drops into emotional free fall until she hits the bottom, and then, like a new person, lifts herself up, greater and stronger spiritually transforming a nightmare into her present day strength and motivation. We perceive two different persons, one before and one after separated by infertility. The book i simple , beautiful and enriching.

 

 

 

The Baby Kangaroo Treasure Hunt

Carmen Martinez-Jover

Two kangaroos: Jack and Sam, a gay couple, have their own baby by means of an egg donor and surrogacy. This story enables children to easily understand how they were conceived and it helps gay parents explain in an easy and loving how how their family was formed.

 

 

 

 

Recipes of How Babies are Made

Carmen Martinez-Jover

Egg donation, sperm donation, embryo donation, surrogacy, adoption and natural birth is explained comparing how a cake is made to how a baby is conceived and it clearly explains all these different forms of conception that exist now-a-days. Just looking at the illustration one can easily understand all this infertility methods. In general, no matter how your child was conceived this book helps them open their minds and informs them of all these artificial reproductive technology methods. This book also helps parents introduce sexuality to their children at a young age.

 

 

A Tiny Itsy Bitsy Gift of Life, an Egg Donor Story

Carmen Martinez-Jover

Now-a-days many children are born through egg donation. This touching story of how a happy couple of rabbits have their own baby by means of egg donation. Using rabbits in this story enables children to easily understand their conception in a simple and loving way. It is through storytelling that parents can explain and children understand naturally these infertility treatments.

 

 

 

 

 

 

We Are Family: Testimonies of Lesbian and Gay Parents

Turan Ali. Continuum International Publishing Group Ltd. 1996.

An engrossing look at the reality of being lesbian or gay and a parent, the ways and means of achieving parenthood, and the benefits and challenges of pink parenting in 90s Britain. Based on original interviews with a broad cross-section of lesbian and gay parents, and their children, this account is proof positive that queer parents are making no "pretence" at creating successful new patterns of family relationships. Among the issues examined are: the taboos and myths that traditionally surround same-sex parenthood; artificial insemination; surrogate mothers; adoption and fostering; custody battles; what to tell the children; what to tell your neighbours; what kids think of their queer parents.

Lesbian and Gay Fostering and Adoption: Extraordinary Yet Ordinary

Forward by Pat Verity and Geri McAndrew. Edited by Stephen Hicks and Janet McDermott. Jessica Kingsley Publishers, 1999, 2000

Key Elements: This body of work contains very personal stories from lesbian and gay fosters and those who have adopted, with information regarding the entire process. The reader should be aware that a number of the issues raised in the text have positively progressed since the book was published; however the seventeen personal accountants from individuals and couples that it contains are timeless. The Editorial Essay provides a lot of factual information on the history of gay and lesbian adopting and fostering.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Queer Parent's Primer: A Lesbian and Gay Families Guide to Navigating the Straight World

Stephanie Brill

Synopsis: Straight talk for Gay parents - a practical guide to parenting challenges

Includes examples and interactive exercises to help you through conflicts, define and protect your family, and celebrate and nourish a proud and loving household

Covers the practical realities of laying a foundation for healthy parenting, coming out once and for all, finding culturally sensitive schools, and making decisions about spirituality and family celebrations.

Also includes a section on special concerns of single parents, the complications of breaking up, and the legal concerns of protecting your family.

 

 

The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians: tips and techniques from conception through birth

Rachel Pepper. Cleis Press, San Francisco, 2005

Key Elements: Covers everything that a woman needs to think about and be aware of as she approaches the decision to have a baby and/or have a healthy and joyful pregnancy.

There are thirteen chapters which cover the process of pregnancy in great detail, including a number of the unspoken topics of pregnancy.

Chapter One: So you Wanna Be a Mama -getting ready for the ride of your life

Chapter Two: Thinking It over and Making a Plan-what you need to work out before you get started

Chapter Three: Getting Started-Now the Fun Really Begins-conception and fertility

Chapter Four: Getting the Goods-sperm, sperm banks, choosing a donor, money and other options

Chapter Five: Surviving the Roller Coaster - Ten Tips to Keep You Sane - taking care of yourself and your body, finding support, taking time out

Chapter Six: Why am I not Pregnant Yet? - Obstacles to the Path to Parenthood -infertility, treatment, fertility drugs, miscarriage and mourning

Chapter Seven: You're Pregnant-the World of Eating, Sleeping, and Puking-pregnancy the first trimester, the emotional nitty-gritty

Chapter Eight: You're Well Into It Now - Your Second Trimester - the golden/second trimester, medical test, making birth decisions, Partners, changing life circumstances, into the third trimester

Chapter Nine: Self-Esteem and Sexuality During Pregnancy - sexual desire during pregnancy, sexual self esteem, intimacy, sexual questions

Chapter Ten: Into the Home Stretch/ The Last Trimester-taking care of yourself, problems that arise, medical test, naming the baby, congratulations and celebrations

Chapter Eleven: Birth - the Big Event - when it is really time, the excitement, the three stages of labor, dealing with complications, partners become parents too

Chapter Twelve: Holy Cow-What Now?-lesbian motherhood, and the postbirth revelations.

Chapter Thirteen: Resources

It's a Family Affair: the complete lesbian parenting book

Lisa Saffron

The essential guidebook for lesbian mothers and their children in Britain. It includes the experiences of birth mothers, co-parents, step-mothers, single mothers, children, fathers and donors.

Everything you want to know about lesbian parenting - adoption and fostering, step-parenting, homophobia at school, coming out to children, legal recognition of co-parents, fertility awareness, self insemination, anonymous vs known donors; the children's perspective; the law; when self-insemination isn't working; donor insemination through clinics.

 

 

 

 

 

Gay and Lesbian Parenting

Eds: Deborah F. Glazer and Jack Drescher

 

 Find sources of support for raising a nontraditional family in a straight world!

The experience of parenting is commonly overlooked in psychological theory, and lesbians and gay men are not typically considered as parents or parents to be. Gay and Lesbian Parenting examines the psychological issues related to developing family and becoming parents for gay men and lesbians. Instead of pathologizing gay and lesbian families, it explores the emotional growth and development issues inherent in child-rearing.

Traditionally, coming out as gay or lesbian meant abandoning any hope of becoming a parent or keeping your children if you already had them. But with the “gayby boom” in full swing, more and more gay and lesbian couples are having new babies, adopting children, and continuing to raise the offspring of previous heterosexual relationships. Although gay and lesbian parents still face unique challenges in building and rearing a family, as well as the usual problems heterosexual couples encounter, Gay and Lesbian Parenting unflinchingly examines these concerns and offers positive suggestions and ideas for dealing with the difficulties.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gay Men Choosing Parenthood

Gerald P. Mallon

 

Gay parenting is a topic on which almost everyone has an opinion but almost nobody has any facts. Here at last is a book based on a thorough review of the literature, as well as interviews with a pioneering group of men who in the 1980s chose to become fathers outside the boundaries of a heterosexual union--through foster care, adoption, and other kinship relationships. This book reveals how very natural and possible gay parenthood can be. What factors influence this decision? How do the experiences of gay dads compare to those of heterosexual men? How effectively do professional services such as support groups serve gay fathers and prospective gay fathers? What elements of the social climate are helpful--and hurtful? Gay Men Choosing Parenthood challenges a great deal of misinformation, showing how gay fathers from different backgrounds adapted, perceived, and constructed their options and their families.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gay Dads: a celebration of fatherhood

David Strah

 

Inspiring portraits of gay men and their families from all across America.

An evolution has quietly been occurring in the world of parenting. Recent surveys reveal that millions of children have found loving homes either by being born to, or adopted by, gay men. This book is a celebration of these remarkable new families.

Gay Dads includes twenty-five personal accounts from men describing their unique journeys to fatherhood and the struggles and successes they have experienced as they raise their children. This is the first book to provide such an expansive exploration of this extraordinary new family unit. With beautiful black-and-white photographs of each of the families, Gay Dads is a moving tribute to familial love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For Lesbian Parents: your guide to helping your family grow up happy, healthy and proud

Suzanne M Johnson and Elizabeth O'Connors. The Guilford Press, 2001

Key Elements: Focuses on couples, parenting and family issues from a lesbian perspective with valuable food for thought on what to consider when becoming a lesbian parent.

Part One: Has two chapters that look at lesbian mothers, who they are and the do and don't for lesbian mothers, what you have to be prepared for as a lesbian parent.

Part Two has seven chapters that explore the transition from couple to family, helping children to better understand the family they are in, dealing with others (including professionals and schools) and helping children to deal with them. Part three also includes a section on religion and spirituality which includes how to shop around for a church, helping children to understand religion, and questions if there is a place for lesbians in traditional religion.

Part Three has three chapters that provide information on gender, sexuality, diversity, and homophobia, including information about Barbie Girl and Macho Boy Syndrome and a look at Lesbian Male Basher and ask the question will children of lesbian mothers be gay.

Part Four has three chapters focusing on breaking up, lesbian step families, alternative insemination, and adoption, also includes coming out to your children and what can do to protect your children and yourself in the event of a break up.

Part Five is for future directions and concluding thoughts

 

The Complete Lesbian and Gay Parenting Guide

Arlene Ister Lev, CSW. Bexkley Books, New York, 2004

Key Elements: contains advice for single parents, same sex couples, bisexual and transgenderd families, adoption, legal issues, emotional issues, and practical parenting issues.

The book contains a breakdown of building the family process from the very beginning starting from 'alternative families' through to family life and four different appendixes with value references on the topic. All of the topics are covered thoroughly. It has everything that potential parents need to think about before starting a family and the concerns that many gay and lesbians parents many is facing at the moment.

Part One: Now That You Have Decided To Become A Parent - this section of the book explores alternative families, the pathways that can lead to parenting and the roadblocks to parenting (infertility and pregnancy loss) and the realities of parenting.

Part Two: Building Healthy Families - this section looks at the queer family cycles meaning the evolution and changes to gay and lesbian couples and families. There is a look at the developmental life cycle theories and the bi-cultural elements of such families. It also tells you what you need to know about the legal system, its documentation and preparing agreements that are linked to the alternative parenting process.

Part Three: When the American Dream Becomes A Nightmare - here the focus is on moving away from the beliefs that everything in wonderful once in a relationship and the children come along. How to evaluate your relationship with children and the experience of change that takes place after the parenting has begun. Domestic violence, addiction and mental illness are written about as important elements of some alternative families that are not discussed.

Part Four: Family Life - Dealing with alternative families at home and in the outside world, positive sexuality at home and in relationship[s, spirituality and religion are discussed in detail along with their impact on the individuals and families.

Families Are Talking

(free booklet to download)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gay Men Choosing to Be Parents

(free booklet to download)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lesbian and Gay Parenting

(free booklet to download)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Guide for Gay Dads

Stonewall

(free booklet to download)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Different families
The experiences of children with lesbian and gay parents

Stonewall

(free booklet to download)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Pregnantpause

A guide for lesbians on how to get pregnant

Stonewall

(free booklet to download)